There's so many changes during this year .. even Mother's Day.. I usually have my mom to celebrate the whole day.. Yes, i do celebrate today at the night.. this year in 2009.. but yet i can't feel that.. i'm there.. i have my seminar after the church.. i don't know izzit im too tired or what.. but it mades me so feel this year is weird..and different... I Really donno how to explain and also express it out.. its so painful.. like thousand and millions of needle poking into it..
At Church ..The ScenaryMade me..really feel so painful.. that everyone has their mom there but i'm not.. im alone.. im always alone .. just like Abondaned..
It Been a Bad Day for me.. That i endure almost 12 hours.. and finally burst at home after dinner.. it's means now also..
I know sometimes im a problematic person to some of u guys , my friends.. i know i have the worst brain ever that i will think every second about negative stuff rather than positive.. is good to have a active brain not is not good to have a active brain such as this..
Haihz.. When will i change and stop thinking.. and to stop making my tears drop .. I really need to think about a way .. God .. please take away this another heavy bag.. that i have been carrying since January.. I'm really tired .. I'm Really Painful .. I'm Really Stress .. I'm Really Frustrated .. I'm Really Useless .. I'm Really Self-fish..
Although Kor u care me so much.. yet i know im self-fish..annoyed.. i'm sorry i gave so many pressure to u.. wasted ur time .. and im useless that i can't help up anything.. But i really really appreciate each day .. each word u told me.. is really meaningful and touches my heart.. I'm really Glad.. God u gave me this bro .. that u say he is the 1.. That he will be taking care of m...Thank You For Everything Bro.. Really .. Although i said it everyday .. but i have no idea how to repay u other than saying Thank You..
God, I Pray that u will take away every parts of the painful scene in my life.. i'm enough of it.. i can't take it anymore.. im really tired.. Flash a vision to me.. that u told me so many things .. that u console me.. but yet i can't put into my heart..i'll have happy days just like 9th of May 2009 .. That i never weared a mask .. and i can be that enjoy and also happy .. and Everyday .. I'll be happy.. Bless all my friends.. will always be protected.. and be healthy.. Bless my family.. that 1 day.. we will be together again.. I'm Thinking TOO Much of Rubbish .. Just Make Me Stop Thinking.. Thank You Lord..
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