Sort of borrowing my dearest bro's blog to express out what the sh*t feeling i'm having now.
Before I start writing, first of all, sorry for the vulgar words that i'm gonna use. Secondly, half way of reading, when you started to feel it's you - STOP READING. Cause it's not you. If you think it's you, sorry to say, are you? Lol.
Here goes.
Stories goes round and round and round. At first I tried to just "listen and ignore". But eversince you accidentally stepped on me over something which is damn ridiculous and not making sense, I start to "listen and feedback". So if you think it's so hard, so tough as if i'm stepping on your throat, then fuck off.
Dear readers, I have a case for you.
Imagine that you're a guy, and you had a huge crush on this girl. Whether she knows or not, she's been hinting you and telling you that "You should stop loving me" but you ignored and continue to pursue until you get to hold her hands.
One day, she came to you and ask you "Should I do this? Should I do that? Oh god! I'm lost! I don't know what should I do!" What will you say? "GO AHEAD BABY! DO WHATEVER YOU LIKE! I WILL SUPPORT YOU IN WHATEVER YOU DO!" or will you actually stand at your own perspective and think what is BEST for her?
From this point, I guess some people already know who I'm mentioning. To you, if you think you are related to whatever I'm writing now and proclaiming that's you, go ahead keep on assuming it's you. Sadly, you will be criticized by me.
If you answered "GO AHEAD BABY! DO WHATEVER YOU LIKE! I WILL SUPPORT YOU IN WHATEVER YOU DO!"
My answer to you is, whether her decision is right or wrong, just a simple push by you, things might just turn out very good or very bad. And from what I see, you guys just pushed her into a well. To the girl that I'm mentioning, for god's sake, be mature and think what is right for you. Just because you are a little lost, seeking help from people that had a HUGE CRUSH on you, won't benefit you much because their answer is only one - GO AHEAD.
If you ask a friend which is not having a huge crush on you, most likely they will give their own opinion to you. Hence, you are better for more options to take. Ask yourself, would you like to have more options to decide for what you think is right? or would you like to have only ONE CHOICE which you have been hesitating all these while?
Sadly, it's too late now for you to step back and say "I'm sorry". I don't care whether I will give you a bad impression from today onwards or not, but if I don't say it out, you will still be relying on them and god who knows you might do things worst and worst because of their "GO AHEAD".
I already have enough stress planning for this gathering and asking people to come. You guys complain budget problem, I change venue. Then you guys complain the food sucks. If I were to take care of everyone's piece in mind ; "NO MONEY LAH" , "WALAO WEI! FOOD THERE KANASAI" and also "I'M BUSY ON THAT DAY", who is going to take care of what i'm thinking? You all very easy bombing in forum say "YES! I'M COMING". In the end? Wow the one which I know is the poorest among them is actually going up HILLTOP and spending his 2 days 1 nights there!
RM20-RM25 dinner is more expensive than going up HILLTOP pay hotel rentals, foods and play outdoor entertainment? Not bad. I guess that's RM20-RM25 to you.
When your good friends starts to say "Girl, you changed! You're so.... Oh god no words could describe you right now! Your attitude STINKS right now!"
What will you be thinking? "Fucker! What kind of friend are you? Insulting me like that! You don't even know what I've gone through all these while!"
Then? Both became enemies. Such a simple relationship changes 180 degrees.
But let me tell you, only close friends will tell you that you changed. No matter how hard their words to you, this is their piece of mind of the LONG LOST you instead of the NEW you.
My conclusion here is:
1. As a girl, think in a wise manner. You might have a lot of guys clinging on you which having a huge enormous crush on you, never seek for their opinion if they only tell you to "why not? GO AHEAD GIRL!" because this carries 50% of chance that leads you to make a wrong decision. So what he might be sweet to you? Reason is because he had a huge crush on you. So what if he answers you "GO AHEAD BABY!", reason is because he wants to pick your attention. Hence, you're giving them slight hope of getting your love eventhough you never had a feeling for them at all. What is to say? You're just toying the guys.
2. When you already know I'm stressing out planning things which you guys supported, at least show some support. Not just neglecting it and fly go up hilltop and enjoy. What is RM20-RM25 to you if you could afford to spend money at GENTING (hilltop).
3. Cherish whoever that's around you and care for them. If they are the ones that don't even care you, they won't be telling you that "You've changed".
See the mistakes you've made. Thats all from me.
B. Ken / Kendrickz
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