Sleepless Night

It's 5 In the Morning now.. I just can't sleep while thinking all the stuffs.. I can't stop myself reading back all the posts 2 years back.. Yours. And Mine.. I nearly broke down into my knees.. Praying hard to God, and to change me, bring me back to that Fantasy.. After years, I thought I could just forget it. But the fact is I can't. and I keep believe that there's a Purpose with this which God has made..
I couldn't bear with all the tears, It's not sorrows but hatreds of myself and regrets of life. That decision, Was never right.. If I could just be a little mature at that moment.. to make a right choice and stand for what is fair and justice for u, Nothing will happen.. And We'll still be happy together.
God, you know what I want. Only you know.. I've tried so much, So much that I've never give up on it still.. I just want you to take me a step further ahead, Lift me up from darkness, and bring me back on the track of Brightness.
The days of serving u, It's never a forceful thoughts. With Laughter , Joy, Peace, and Love I do it with.. Maybe God.. It's her that gonna push me all through these.. Maybe it's not mine already.. But at least, I know I tried, and I can get back on that Track that supposed to be together..

All I could do , it's just to tell myself to stay strong.. I wanted to make the right choice now, But I just doesn't have the guts, just because I was too obsessed on how he gonna feel. God, Help me on this. Give me a Way, and Strength..
You Love. Never Fails. You , Have Never Left Me. You, Are a God, That Always Exist and Around Everyone Else.. :) ...